Lately, I've been trying to recover a sense of relational safety by doing small things with people where nothing bad happens. It’s a way of training the nervous system that it is safe to lower its guard, stop scanning for threat.
Your conscious mind knows you probably won't be handcuffed or carted away or put into some tribunal for something you're accused of but haven't done. But because of what has happened, your body or rather your brainstem that controls your body's responses doesn't know that.
If practicing relational safety is effective, I shouldn’t feel the regular panic and freezing fear that have become normal since the attacks by Pigface and his allies and enablers in Social services. My body should stop flooding with cortisol causing the physical problems that have arisen since July, the month after mum was taken.
I try to do this in particular through craft - sewing in my case because there is something regulatory about the repeated in and out of the needle, the focus on the task, perhaps even in the other people around engaged in similar quiet things. You hear the conversation around but there is no requirement to join in. You are vaguely part of something, but not a focus so you can't be target. You are just part of the background, the fabric, the context.
Sometimes I find a fire in some public place and the sound of it is reassuring, sometimes it's a cafe.
I thought I would find doing these activities easier outside of my own city because the whole area is a threat zone due to the constant presence of Social Services somewhere either on or off duty.
It would be unthinkable to meet someone from Social Services in a social situation - like a monster masquerading as a human.
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